Wednesday, October 18, 2017

A Quintessential Guide: 5 Dating and Relationship Fundamentals

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Want to grow old with someone? We all have it in us, but of course, there are rules in the game of love. Click the photo for more tips.

As my inaugural post for Recoveryourlove.com, I feel an introduction is in order. Otherwise, you’re all going to be asking, “Who is this girl and why does she think she knows what she’s talking about?” Well, I can’t say I’m an expert. In fact, I don’t really believe that anyone can be an expert on human relationships because they are so multi-faceted, inherently intricate, and just overall complicated. They vary so much from person to person and group to group. I have, however, been through the heart breaks and heart-breaking, the normal and dysfunctional, and the fun and boring.

 

Here are some basics that I believe about dating and relationships:

 

1. I’m all about not wasting your time on someone who doesn’t love you the way you deserve to be loved. Have you read “He’s Just Not That Into You”? It’s almost a cliche by now, but it’s seriously a must-read for the single and coupled-up alike. If he/she’s not committing to you, not marrying you, not sleeping with you, keeps breaking up and getting back together with you, etc., it’s time to move on, or at the very least, for a discussion.

 

2. A lot of people will tell you that they don’t like games; they just want someone straight-forward. This is only true to a certain extent. Everyone wants what they can’t have or something that they have to work hard for. It’s just human nature, plain and simple. I believe that it is extremely important to be yourself, but you can still be yourself while maintaining a sense of mystery. It’s intriguing. Let that cat chase you a little, mouse.

 

3. Lack of communication, notably respectful communication, is absolutely the biggest barrier in an otherwise healthy relationship. My friends sometimes come to me with an issue they’re having with their significant other instead of talking to the other person in the relationship. This, more often than not, ends in a big blowout when all those nasty feelings and annoyances they’ve been suppressing finally surface. Everyone is different; respectful communication allows those differences to coexist.

 

4. Sometimes taking time apart is truly the best and sanest solution. Two of my good friends are in a (rather volatile) relationship. One night, they got in a huge fight, and he was so angry that he punched a bus. Yes, a steel bus. He had to get surgery on his hand and wore a cast for a month. Not exactly the best reminder of a bad night. Despite the evidence that the relationship was literally wounded, they didn’t take time apart to cool down and heal. A few weeks later, they got in another fight. He stormed off, slammed the door behind him, and, not realizing that she was behind him, accidentally slammed her finger in the door. Not surprisingly, she had to get surgery on her hand as well. The moral of this crazy story: Taking time apart allows you to think, forgive and calm down… and results in fewer fight-induced surgeries.

 

5. Dating and relationships aren’t always the most fun aspect of life. They really suck sometimes. The important thing is to view the whole thing as an adventure. If you’re single, laugh at the bad dates, enjoy meeting new people and trying new things, and cherish your freedom. If you’re in a relationship, learn to let your walls down and accept someone for who he/she is, challenge yourself by finding new ways to keep things fresh and interesting, and appreciate the fact that you have someone by your side who is willing to go through life’s insanity with you.

 

To dig a little deeper into romance and discover more ways to build a happy relationship, click here.

Comments

3 Responses to “A Quintessential Guide: 5 Dating and Relationship Fundamentals”
  1. jennifer says:

    hey, how do i get my boyfriend back , after breaking up for 3months and he has moved on.

  2. admin says:

    Hey Jennifer,

    If you haven’t already, you should get our “how to get your boyfriend back videos”! They have helped tons of others in your situation. Here is where you can request the videos:

    http://www.recoveryourlove.com/boyfriend-back

    Tony

  3. Vikash says:

    I say you stick with the old guy or quit them both. It’s unfair to play with poplee’s feelings. Unfortunately, you can’t always have your cake and eat it. So think wisely before you act so you won’t hurt anybody. Good luckReply+12Was this answer helpful?LikeDislike

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